CUSTOMS
March 2025
Inspired by a solo trip through the South of France in October 2024, “Customs” celebrates the most valuable things I brought back: perspective and wisdom. Rather than enabling the escape I expected, being abroad helped me confront my sorrows closest to home. It turns out, galavanting around Europe alone felt a lot like the state in which I find myself at home: in a quiet, aching desire for deep love and family that I believe exists but has yet to arrive. I realized it in moments when I felt a little lost and vulnerable in my aloneness. Or when I felt unsure but still excited for what I was going to discover. The way I was perpetually hopeful but a little terrified at all times. Balancing the gusto of getting out there to explore with the rate-limiting wisdom of my boundaries. While wanderlusting for something I can’t quite define with words because I know it can only be felt. Between embracing disappointment, course-corrections, serendipity and the bravery of it all. Letting my heart be awed, swooned, and uplifted, and feeling the gentle pull of my head’s tethers of safely to reality.
Juxtaposing unprecedented amorphous watercolor backgrounds (made of natural pigments from France) to reflect the spirit of wanderlust, with new compositions of characteristic lines to reflect reality, barriers, and fear, “Customs” captures both the hope and the despair of an unfinished journey to a heart’s true desire.
"Literally meaning “decountrification”, this term more closely means the feeling of being an outsider - both the disorientation and the giddy excitement of possibility. While I certainly felt this way on my first day in Provence, I more often feel this way amongst friends my age who are already engaged, married, with kids, or in serious relationships. I feel left out, sometimes with deep despair and sometimes happily, as I know I’m not done with my solo journey."
Dépaysement "Change of Scenery" (Aix-en-Provence) SOLD
7 x 5in Oil and watercolor on panel
October 2024
"Gratitude for the undeniable beauty of the journey itself settles in unexpected moments of new perspective. An impeccable hilltop view of the sparkling French Riviera right as the high noon bell tower rings - that does the trick. Or it’s being out with friends and someone takes your picture and you realize how joyful, healthy, and relaxed you look surrounded by a perfectly valid source of true love."
Esprit élevé “Lifted Spirit” (Menton, FR)
12 x 8in Oil and watercolor on panel
December 2024
“Your gut is your greatest resource during new experiences. A waiter reminded me of this in a little beach town when I sat down for a late lunch, and I said I didn’t know if I needed a coffee or a cocktail, to which he responded “if you have to ask, you already know”. I promptly ordered a martini called “the prostitute” and was reminded of a great piece of dating advice: after a first date, ask your body and you will know. Were you relaxed or tense? Was your body open towards them or closed away from them? Do your cheeks hurt from smiling or does your head hurt from fake laughing? Do you have butterflies? If you kissed, did you get goosebumps? Your body knows, just ask.”
Savoir “To Know”
(Ville Franche-sur-mer, FR)
20 x 16in Oil and watercolor on panel
November 2024
“You will never know if fate is real unless you are willing to surrender to the universe. Sometimes nature knows the way, and you have to let yourself be carried by forces more powerful than you instead of fighting against them. Maybe you’re in Gordes, FR, and you almost don’t go because it’s a hilltop village and it’s the windiest day ever. But you do and quite literally get blown into a castle where you meet the French version of yourself at a pop-up art show of local talent. She has a gorgeous husband, and he has a single brother… oh la la.”
Rencontre Fortuite “Chance Encounter” (Gordes, FR)
24 x 18in Oil and watercolor on panel
October 2024
“It’s ok to stay tethered to things that are calming during intentional efforts to breach the comfort zone. In France, it looked like planning just one activity in advance: kayaking on a brightly colored body of water. I knew my nervous system would need it after a long week exploring new towns. A bit like putting on a fuzzy sweater and calling a friend after a first date.”
Infallible “Foolproof” (Verdon, FR)
20 x 16in Oil and acrylic on panel
October 2024
“Oh the joy when a whim goes your way! If your gut tickles with “yes” energy, the risk will give way to reward. Your new French bestie insists you visit the town where natural pigments are sold, and then join her for a vernissage that evening? To hell with the itinerary. Date number two is going well, but the dinner is over? Make up a craving for ice-cream, get a cone, and walk off the calories hand-in-hand.”
Caprice “Whim” (Rousillion, FR)
7 x 5in Oil and watercolor on panel
December 2024
“To me, it’s no coincidence that these words are homophones in the French language. The comforting embrace of the water - anywhere in the world - is a blissfully ephemeral relief from the weight of the world, or a heavy heart, just like a mother’s hug."
Mer Mère “Mother Sea” (Côte d’Azur)
12 x 8in Oil and watercolor on panel
December 2024
“Sometimes the end goal seems too far away, too hard, impossible to reach: hopeless. This is a dirty word. You must remain steadfast, stay hopeful, and keep trying. My daytrip to Èze was almost cancelled due to a train disaster that had me stuck for hours. Bound and determined, I pivoted and found another way and it ended up being one of my favorite days. I got the best Riviera view, spoke french for hours with a wonderful artist, and bought a beautiful dress that I now cherish as a reminder of the treasures I am destined for when I push through hopelessness."
Dévoué “Devoted” (Èze, FR)
7 x 5in Oil and watercolor on panel
October 2024
“Depending on your mindset, it can be either maddening or exhilarating: when you know you’re in the right place but it’s the wrong time. Timing is divine, it isn’t up to us. All you can control is placing yourself where you are happy. I drove through the lavender fields I have dreamed of my whole life in October - out of season. But I wasn’t sad, I was grateful. I was driving alone! If they were in full bloom I would have gotten in an accident swooning over the purple spectacle. I’ll see them in their full glory one day, I just know it. And I’ll be able to look as long as I want, while my husband drives."